I think I can count on my hands the number of times we, as a family, have been out to dine at a restaurant with our little boy…and he’s 13 months old! It’s just so difficult…and it’s getting more difficult now that he’s mobile. I remember as an infant the fear I had of taking my son out to any occasion that would last long enough to require a nursing session. Breastfeeding did not come easily or naturally for us like it does for most. We struggled for a long time and any time we were out of our comfort zone my son and I did not fare well. In the early days of infancy, my husband and I would take turns walking the baby while the other ate. It made for rushed, cold meals. But hey…at least we didn’t have to cook or clean up. I remember one night when we were out with my in-laws…who live in the South. Now I’m from California so I’m not used to such genuine displays of hospitality…or modesty. I couldn’t get my son to nurse for anything. I think nursing covers are a great idea…in theory. Realistically? They didn’t work for me. Maybe we were supposed to practice at home first? Well my son DID NOT LIKE being covered up. He would cry and refuse to latch and as he got older kick or bat it off. Well, I was getting the looks from other tables…from women mind you. And I was getting frustrated and stressed. My father-in-law was sitting across the table encouraging my husband to cover me up help me out. And then I did what I should not have done. I left the table. I went downstairs to the lounge where the restrooms were and calmed us both down. It’s a shame that here we are in 2008 living in a society that gives women conflicting messages. “Breast is Best…” Unless you’re at a restaurant…or the mall…or at church…or at work… We’ve almost weaned now but I know that motherhood has changed me…next time I’ll do things differently. I’ll worry more about my child and less about what other people think…
These days the challenges are different. We rush for different reasons. To avoid that moment when my son decides he’s done eating, done with the high chair, and done with the restaurant. Usually we start by pulling out the paper and crayons…which inevitably end up on the floor. We then try to occupy him with anything new or different while we quickly scan the menu. Sugar packets, Cheerios, and mommy’s purse are all great distractions. If my husband and I are able to finish eating before my son has a toddler meltdown, it’s a success. My son is very curious so we’ve started allowing him to eat little bites from our plate when he’s done with his meal and that has also helped with dining out. When all else fails, we elicit the help of my parents. What grandparent wouldn’t want to spend a night out dining with a toddler trying to climb out of the high chair to run around the restaurant? They live for that!
While I still find that going out isn’t as relaxing as it once was, I’ve found that it’s getting easier. As long as the restaurant is family-friendly with enough background noise to drown out my son when he starts to get fussy, we venture out.
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I can totally identify! My daughter is almost three and we still sometimes have trouble keeping her occupied in the restaurant. Here are some of the solutions I’ve come up with:
*Ask around to find the best places to eat with toddlers. Some restaurants are much more family-friendly, as I’m sure you’ve discovered.
*Dine at an off-hour. I’ve found that the kids (and especially we parents) can have a lot more fun if the restaurant isn’t totally packed. We try to hit the restaurants between breakfast and lunch, or between lunch and supper. You’ll be surprised how much better an experience you have at these times.
*Study the menu beforehand, if possible. Many restaurants have websites with their menus online. Don’t let the waitress run off to get your drinks. Order your food as soon as you sit down, and there’s a better chance you will finish eating BEFORE the toddler meltdown begins!
Good luck, and I hope my tips help, even a little bit! Remember: someday you’ll look back and fondly on these days!!
I totally understand about eating out. My son is 12 months old and he gets antsy really fast. He does really love playing with my pocket book. But, unfortunately, he also loves screaming and throwing food around. It can be quite dangerous eating out with him.