Siblings

We told him much sooner than I had anticipated.  Mums the word until week 12, right?  But I was sick…very, very sick.  And he needed to know why mommy was lying on the couch all day…or stuck in the bathroom for too long.  In a small way, I felt like he understood (as much as a toddler can) that mommy wasn’t herself.  

Thankfully, week 12 came and things were still “ok,” apart from the fact that I was still sick.  The pregnancy went smoother (although not without trials) than my first.  I was nervous to get his hopes up too soon about a baby brother or sister.  He had some knowledge of babies with my neighbor, cousin, and good friend having babies within weeks of each other.  

And then around 20 weeks, we told him her name.  We told him he would have a sister and that she was growing in mommy’s tummy.  He was always so delighted to talk about her.  

I was warned by many experienced moms about the types of expectations I should have once she arrived.  Jealousy…acting out…at best he would just ignore her.  We did all we could to prepare him for her arrival.  As the days got closer, I worried more and more about how he would react.  My baby…my sweet handsome boy…I didn’t want to hurt him.  I didn’t want him to feel like he had been replaced. 

Almost everything about my birth experience was positive.  I only wish I had been able to bring him to the hospital to meet her. But it’s flu season…and toddlers carry germs that hospitals aren’t willing to take a chance with.  So he was restricted from seeing me until I came home.  One of the most joyous days of my life and I couldn’t share it with my son.  

I came home one day early from the hospital (that’s all they’d allow).  On Christmas Eve, my parents brought my son down and he met his baby sister for the first time.  He knew exactly who she was.  He touched her gently and talked to her.  He asked if she was ok…if I was ok.  He tried to suck on her pacifier.  And give her juice.  Do you know what he didn’t do?  He didn’t ignore her…or act out…or resent her.  

Curiosity is the best word to describe how my son feels about his baby sister.  We’re teaching him to be gentle…we’re teaching him that she’s not ready to play yet…or drink juice…or eat crackers.  But my son is as sweet as can be with our baby girl.  

It’s been a wonderful week…filled with the joy of new life and change and a tiny bit of chaos.  It’s going to be an adjustment…recovering from major surgery and childbirth…juggling an active 2 year old…functioning on a serious reduction in sleep.  But we’re surviving….we’re more than surviving.  This Christmas will always be remembered as the year that three became four…the year that my son became a big brother…the year that our hearts, which we thought were as big as could be, grew to welcome a second child into our home.  

Praise God for the miracle of life.  

 ¹³Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 
 ¹⁴“Glory to God in the highest, 
      and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.” – Luke 2:13-14

Merry Christmas!  

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Caryn Bailey

Caryn is a NICU nurse by day, blogger by night and mom 24/7. She savors the warm Southern California sun and loves to travel, shopping, baking, reading and frequenting her local tea room. Caryn created the column Lavishly Green for Peekaboo Picks Magazine to share her best tips for going green in style, she is the Former editor for Family Review Network, former OC Family Magazine online contributor, former Orange County Moms Blog contributor, former Evenflo Savvy Parent contributor, former member of the Totsy Advisory Board and former freelance writer for CBS Los Angeles.

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