5 Things I Wish I Knew Before Potty Training My Kids

“My daughter potty-trained in one day”

“My son told ME he wanted to use the potty”

“It was so easy!”

Potty training. It’s one of the less glamorous parts of parenting, requiring an extraordinary amount of patience and the ability to let go of some control.  The quotes above are just some of the things parents have told me in the five years I’ve been a mother. None of them describe our potty training situation, which I guess leads me to my first thought.

• No two children are alike. We all know that each of our children are unique…in their appearance and personality.  So why is it that we expect our daughter to potty train in one day just like my girlfriend’s daughter? Or why is it that we expect our son to stop having accidents in the middle of the night once he is in school just because his friends were nighttime trained by the age of 3?  If we let go of how we think things should be based on what we’ve been told and pay attention to the cues our children are giving us, there will be less frustration all around.  Each child is unique and therefore no two methods will work exactly the same way, as evidenced by my two children who each potty trained at different ages using different techniques.
• It will take time.  There are definitely stories of children who potty trained in one day…or even a weekend. But in my personal experience, potty training takes time.  Sometimes a child may be developmentally ready, but not emotionally ready (or vice versa).  Again, paying attention to your child’s cues will be very helpful in determining when to begin the process and when to persist or give it some time.
• Messes lead to successes. We’re talking about bodily functions, so naturally we would assume that the process of potty training a child could be messy. But it isn’t until your child has wee’d all the way through the layers of his/her car seat that you realize just how messy it can be. Unfortunately, there isn’t a great way around it as children are likely going to have accidents. You can be prepared with extra clothing, plastic bags, and clean-up supplies (I carry a bag with these items in my car). Additionally, a child really needs to feel wet in order to master the skill of potty training.  So chalk those messes up to eventual success.
• It will happen.  Unless a child has a medical condition, he/she will likely potty train.  Maybe it will be at 3…or 4.  But in retrospect, the age at which they train won’t matter in a few years so hold on to that hope and stay positive that you and your child will succeed.
• You will feel a range of emotions.  We are nearing the end of our potty training, and my husband and I are elated. We have two boys and girls who are becoming more and more independent and less and less dependent on us.  That is a good feeling…but it’s also bittersweet. Our children are growing up. For me, diapers represent the “baby” stage, and very soon, that will be gone.  Each phase in our children’s life is unique and special, and regardless of how frustrating potty training can be, remember that it is only a stage…one that will soon be gone.

Over the past five years, we’ve purchased and received a TON of potty training products.  Here are the ones we used the most!

1. A Soft Potty Seat
2. Stickers and Treats (lots of them!)
3. Absorbent, breathable, movable diapers/training pants and flushable wipes
4. Underwear Starring Your Child’s Favorite Character
5. Kid-Friendly Potty Training Books/DVDs

Pre training pants, we used Pampers Cruisers (and in fact, Pampers Swaddlers) because we love the snug 3-way fit that allows tots to be active without any leakage. And because characters always make my children, you’ll find Elmo, Cookie Monster, and the rest of the Sesame Street gang on these diapers!  Not only are they super soft, they offer up to 12 hours of protection against leaks. Through the end of April, Walmart is offering Super Packs of Pampers for just under $25.  Bonus: Each box includes $45 in coupon savings.